I'm getting old!!!!!!!
For the record:School is going well lately, I’m doing a lot better than I should be doing. I NEVER do anything at all. I’m being lazy but still get decent grades. I’m trying to pull my general GPA up (which it won’t be hard with my classes). Dancing is “there” It’s not doing great but not bad neither… I’m better than my dance partners and I have to teach them everything I know, which helps but I’m not improving that much; For fall semester my dance partners are TONS better than me, so I’m excited to become a good dancer. But right now it’s “there” and it keeps me active. I dance like 30 or more hours a week, so it’s healthy and tons fun!
So I noticed that I haven’t felt bad, sad or negative feeling lately. Well, except that I’ve been frustrated with school, dance, gym and partying. My day starts at 6:30am and finish at 10:30pm almost every day… So sometimes I get in a bad mood, but I don’t really get sad or depressed.
My friends are helping me out so much. Croatian guy is like my best friend right now, we hang out everyday and we do fun things all the time! It’s like the friend I can call and say “let’s go to starbucks! Let’s go to Nordstrom or Banana, let’s go to watch a movie, let’s eat, let’s go to the gym, let’s go hot tubing, let’s call people and hang out, let’s take random pics, let’s run, let’s do anything we feel like doing” and we just hang out and have great time! Finally when I get a person that I can have FUN with all the time, that person has to go! I know, sad! It seems like all my best friends have to go somewhere far away and I’m destined to be alone and use msn mssg to keep in touch with them.
Anyway, So far I’m having so much fun hanging out with people and having a great time… but everything would be gone next week. 90% of the people I hang out with will be gone by Saturday and I’ll have to find new friends in P-town again. Isn’t sad? I feel I’m going to be depressed again sometime soon. At least in 20 days I’ll be at home and I’ll have a car for sure!
So I have a crush on someone! I know this person since February, and we just been friends since then. Lately I have this huge crush and I’m so scared to invite that person out on a date. I feel I’m not good enough; I feel insecure… but for now just talking on the phone, chatting and text messaging is enough. I met this other person at the club (which I’ll call blue eyes) Blue eyes is cute and cool, but I just like “blue yes” I don’t have a crush on him. I do have a crush in the other person thou! I feel frustrated! I don’t know what to do! I don’t know if that person likes me back or not! I can’t tell!
Lately I’ve gone shopping like crazy, every weekend I come with new Nordstrom, Banana and Hollister bags! Since I have unsecured credit, credit cards are my favorite toys!! I can’t wait until Vegas to do serious shopping for my fall clothes! Sad huh? Because I don’t feel comfortable with myself if I’m not wearing pretty clothes or until I feel comfortable with my outfit. Actually I found it really stupid, but I have tried to dress like a “regular BYU white boy” and it just doesn’t feel comfortable, I feel ugly and I feel like nobody. Anyway… at least in my new place almost everyone dresses well and people are really metro, so I don’t feel bad dressing good. BTW I love Belmont condos! I’m moving there tomorrow!
My very best friend from back Home is coming to visit me next week! She is coming with her cousin and it’s going to be great! I’m really excited to see her and to hang out with her! I think I’m going to “come out” with her and see how things go. I feel like I need to tell her about “me”, we’ll see if I ended up doing it!
My best friend of my exchange student year is coming as well! She’s coming from Venezuela tomorrow night! I’m about to “pee” my pants to see her after 2 years! She is getting here on time for my birthday! She is adorable! Who would travel so far for my birthday? I feel loved that 2 of my best friends are coming to Utah to visit me and hang out with me! I’m so lucky to have such great friends and it really shows me that friends are there no matter the distance or time. (yeah I know I just said that I will feel lonely because my p-town friends are leaving… but I won’t have anyone to hang out with! So it’s sad for me! But I know that at least one of them will be in touch with me) Anyway… Real friends are there when you need them no matter what… I’m happy that I have few FRIENDS (even thou they’re far far far away)
So I’m getting old, I’m going to be 20 years old in 2 days…. I’m not doing anything special for it. I think I’d get depressed if I have a party. My Venezuelan friend is going to be here, so that’s way too cool for my birthday, just to hang out with her it’d make my day happy! I’m really excited for my birthday thou! I have my last rehearsal for team, I’m learning the mambo scene for the “West side story” (oh yeah, I’m in a play!) I’m going to see my friend from Venezuela and I have a free dance lesson! My teacher is giving me my “birthday present”! cool huh?! And Finally! She’s going to see me dancing!! I’ll be in my new place with my 2 cool roommates… so yeah! Not a bad day at all (I hope)
Anyway, so many random things, and few to say! Time to go!
posted by Latin Stud! @ 10:54 PM
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